Irony

Had a great meeting last night.  Laughed until I cried then cried until I laughed.  I love meetings like that.  It's so refreshing to go to Al-Anon and finally feel a connection with other people.  The Beast doesn't support me going because he doesn't have a problem, of course.  But I've commited to getting a sitter for the kids so I can go and not have to rely on his mood if he'll stay with the kids or not. 

So what's so ironic?  The Beast was so very tired that he did nothing but sit on the couch while I cleaned before the meeting.  Then, when I called him after the meeting to see if he wanted to ride with me to get the kids (about 1/2 hour each way), he was at the bar.  Ha!  I was at Al-Anon and he was at the bar!  And he doesn't have a problem?!?  BUT, last nights topic was letting go, and I'm going to practice that today.  I'm also working on step 1.  I thought I had that one down, but I still catch myself wanting to control the alcohol.  I like the mantra "I didn't cause it.  I can't control it. I can't cure it."  I am going to use that this week as I deal with not only my husband, but any others I feel I need to control or feel responsible for.